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/0511/2002 Archived Entry: "Stuff and nonsense!"

Last night, Candy was having a problem with the computer at home. She kept trying to look at clip art using Word so she could make pretty things for her students. Unfortunately, it kept crashing.
Last week, I got an error message saying something along the lines of 'Various files to run Windows are corrupted, please insert your Windows XP CD-Rom to fix them'. I e-mailed Hewlett Packard, as I didn't have a CD of Windows XP. They emailed me back to say that my PC had the contents of the CD ROM saved on a 'hidden partition' and that I needed to run a 'non-destructive system restore' programme to fix the problem.
Thinking the two problems may be connected, I did this last night - after backing up all my important files and documents, thank god - except for my bookmarks. However, the non-destructive system restore programme managed to destroy my system. After it had completed, I got a message saying 'The system is not fully installed. Re-run set up.' Which I couldn't do because there was never an option to do this. Needless to say, I was a little annoyed. I have emailed HP - after talking to a human who said that I actually had to ring a premium rate number, which rather annoyed me, because I was 'just following instructions' from them. We'll see what happens now.
However, and this is the really great thing... I was sent an automatic reply email to my email and it included a link to a site if you needed to call them. I thought I'd try it. This is what I got:
HPScreen

Two random things.

Last night, walking home, I saw that the Post Office were advertising 'Lord Of The Rings' stamps. Win £100,000 or something if you find the One Ring in your pack of stamps. This set me to thinking - I do a lot of that, as you will see - and that thinking led me to this thought: Surely, it would be more lucky to NOT get the One Ring in your pack of stamps? I mean, it's not as if Frodo had a good time of it when he got hold of it, was it? "Don't get the One Ring and win!" may not be as exciting a slogan, but it certainly has more of the sense of Tolkien's ideas behind it. The same goes for packets of 'Lord of The Rings Jelly Rings' I saw on sale in a shop (but didn't buy, you'll be glad to know...). Two problems with this one - firstly, there is the aforementioned problem of Orcs, evil Wizards and various Nasties trying to get their hands on you because of your ownership of the Ring. Secondly, a packet of One Rings? Isn't this ever so slightly tautologous?

The other random thing. I was working TO work this morning (can you see a pattern forming?) and I saw an ad for a website where you could vote for your favourite No.1 single of all time to celebrate the 50th Anniversary of the Official Singles Chart. This set me to thinking of what my choice would be. Bohemian Rhapsody? Shiny Happy People? Dizzy? Then it hit me. Of Course: "There's No One Quite Like Grandma" by The St Winifred's Girls School Choir! I'm trying to find a photo of the delightfully cute, adenoidally challenged little girl who fronted this popular Beat Combo, but I'm not having much success. Dammit!

Found one....

Ain't she cute?

Posted by Stephen @ 11/07/2002 09:30 AM GMT

Of I find the One Ring, in a pack of stamps or anywhere else, I shall expect to win world domination. I will not be fobbed off with a mere £100,000!

Posted by Lobelia Sackville-Baggins @ 11/06/2002 09:27 AM GMT

But can you imagine the fun at the staff meeting in the One Ring kids school?

" So, Mrs Smithers, you say that little Johnny Briggs was being hounded around the playground by nine sixth formers but escaped them when he was directed into the upper school girls toilet and the prefect started spraying them with water?"

" Yes..."

" But then one of the prefects classmates scared the shit out of him by tempting him with her body?"

" Yes..."

" But the poor tyke got away, only to be cornered in the caretakers cupboard by one of the special needs kids, calling it 'his precious'?"

" Yes headmaster.."

" And this was for a sweet?"

" Yes, headmaster..."

" And where is this sweet, this simple, lovely sweet. I must have it you see Mrs Smithers. I must have it for my own."

" It's mine Headmaster! Mine! I found it in his desk, I did!!"

etc etc etc.

Neil

Posted by Neil @ 11/05/2002 11:58 AM GMT